The Hoffman Process came at a time in my life when I was full of toxic shame for the patterns I was living in my life. I was getting the same feedback over and over again towards my behaviour. I was not empathetic, considerate, mindful or kind to people around me especially at work. Here I was extremely task oriented and had lost my compassion and humanity.
I had become institutionalised in the workaholic mindset and was very riteuous, superior-minded and angry with people and the world. I was anxious constantly and suffering from depression. This state took me to a place where I devalued myself and beat myself up to a pulp emotionally everyday in my unattainable quest to control and prove my ability and make everything I was doing perfect.
The process was an experience I will never forget and will continue to practice throughout my journey in life. Why? Because it grounded me in my spiritual self, allowed and enabled me to find myself again, my true self. Not the self I thought I had become. It gave me the tools to become highly and keenly aware of the patterns I had learned from my parents.
The negative love that I had been living out in my everyday life that was not my true self. Looking into my patterns gave me that insight I needed to make a life change. A lasting change in my being. It gave me a perspective to which I had scratched the surface of but had not truly understood the impact on my behaviour toward others and myself.
Through becoming aware of my patterns the process took me through an expression evolution, drawing out and confronting my dark side and my negative love patterns to start to free my spiritual self of the hurtful and painful life I was leading.
Compassion and forgiveness is key to the whole process and the third step toward toward freeing yourself of your negative patterns. For me this step was hard to achieve, as I thought I had already forgiven but the true gift was in finding the compassion and unconditional love that I had never experienced in my life. There was always a catch and always a repercussion.
Embodying this and finding my ‘right road’ put an energy into my spiritual self that had been suppressed and taken over by my intellect. Finding compassion for myself and forgiving myself enabled me to value myself and recognise my contribution to the world is valued and encouraged.
The final step of uncovering new behaviours is an ongoing process, using everything learnt about myself. Centering and grounding myself is my key to staying balanced and live a life full of love, light and positive energy both from within me and the outside world and to contribute towards a better human race, planet and energy in the universe.